February 5, 2013

What Is Real?

Having trouble today figuring out what is real. It all feels like one massive episode of Deja Vu.  Watching television shows that I do not remember watching, yet I can remember what happens.  So, either I am psychic or I am loosing big huge chunks of my memories. 

Today is a day when I wish I could wake up.  The music is helping. For some reason it helps to bring me back to the here and now.  Even that is starting to cause episodes of Deja Vu. 

I read that episodes of Deja Vu can actually be your brain registering what is happening now as memories.  A misfiring of the brain supposedly. Does the almost constant Deja Vu mean my brain is misfiring on a grand scale, or am I simply suffering from my mental disorder?  I hate not knowing, I really wish I could get better.  I know the medication helps with the mood swings, what helps the rest of it. 

Today I feel that my bi polar is getting the better of me.  Right now my hands are shaking so bad from the medications that its hard to type. 
Oops, spaced out there for a minute, was listening to the music.  At least my brain took a small break.  Typing my thoughts helps me keep track of what is going on.  Well, that's all for now. 

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